Update on my life!

Its been awhile since I last wrote in my blog. I actually didn't think it was that far back until I just now looked, but alot has happened since then.

God has truly blessed me and yet I still struggle with where He is taking me in this journey of life.  I know He is big on opening up doors in our lives and also closing them.  I know sometimes we see the lesson as it happens and then we see it later down the road, but I know its for our good.  

I wont lie, sometimes I still get sad at certain doors that have been closed,  I seem to somehow put the blame on myself.  Then I see doors that are opened and I know Christ is right there pouring His blessings on me.  As humans we tend to see door closings as a deep loss or even a failure, but then we see why certain things didn't go to plan or certain relationships or jobs didn't work out.  Its where we need to completely put our trust and faith in God that He is working His good in our lives.

Where have I been?

That's a good question.  I tend to always step back from social media and the Internet to grasp reality.  So many people, including myself can get wrapped up in other peoples lives or wondering who's doing what that we forget whats truly important.  I know most people might say, "I can walk away anytime", but try it!!!  You will be surprised at how much of a tendency you will have to pick up your phone to sign on to whatever website you are connected too.  I just think we need to step away often and look at the relationships that is around us.

1. God has blessed me with someone whom calls me his angel, but in reality he is my angel, to help take care of my house issue and I am truly overwhelmed and blessed.  I needed help financially with one situation for over and a year and then another issue for a few months and God just did His thing and took care of me!!! I pretty much have had my whole house re-done (When its complete, I plan to write a blog with pictures). 

2. I also have a new member to my family. (I will post pics of them soon)

3. I got to meet my cousin from my dads side of the family, not once, but twice since I last blogged!  He remembers playing with me when we were kids and I told him I didn't remember.  Then I said, I remember this one time of playing in the backyard with a fence all around and a play set and the tree leaves were dead cause of Autumn with a boy in the backyard.  He then told me, "Yep, that was me at my dads house".  So I did remember!!!  I felt like Ive known him my whole life and I just felt comfort to have met someone that was a part of me that I never got to see growing up.  He told me that I look like alot of the women when they were younger on my dads side and I see it!  To be almost 30 years old and just figuring out half of who you are is very overwhelming.  I remember at dinner one night, my cousin said, "Just to let you know, when Conners' get mad, they SNAP!"  I was praising the good Lord above, because I never knew where I got that from.  My family is so laid back and I didn't understand why I got so mad so quick, but now I can blame it on the genes.  The good part is though, we don't stay mad long!

4.  I have gone on a few dates since I last blogged.  I don't know what God has planned,  but I had a great time and it brought lots of smiles to my face.

5.  I re-did my living room!  I never liked the color it was before and since alot of the outside was having a make-over, I wanted to do the living room.  I still want to be able to put down some wood floors, but that will wait. I am still trying to pay off debt.

6.  God has blessed me with 2 little mini vacations.  I honestly thought that I would be a hermit at home this summer, but God allowed me to have lots of adventures and meet new people and also old friends!

7.  I'm still close to getting to my goal of my weight loss, but seem to get stuck alot.  I have actually won the Biggest Loser at work and I keep going up and down in the weight scale.  When you get down to the last somewhat pounds, its hard to get those last off, but I'm determined and I'm not giving up.  

I have a few more months until I turn the big 3-0.  There are moments where I'm super excited, because I cant wait to see what the next  10 years are going to be.  I'm claiming in Jesus name that they are going to be the best years!!! I'm a little sad, because these past 10 years sure did fly and its not quite exactly where I thought I would be at 29, but God knew, so I just need to trust that He has great plans for me.

I have lots of pictures and lots of things I could get more detailed about, but this pretty much sums up the past couple of months.  I'm sure there is more, but I cant think of them right now.  I did miss blogging, but I was enjoying life!!!

What are you doing?

I'm in a season of singleness right now and don't mind it at all.  I have spent the past year on learning about being single, since technically this is the first time that Ive had time with just God and myself and I'm learning on what He wants from us during this time.  God has also placed tons of people in my life whom are single and I have been sharing the knowledge that I have learned.

One main thing that I have came across lately and catch myself repeating alot is "What are you doing to prepare yourself for your spouse?"  If you truly are seeking God and is single and wanting the mate He has for you, then this is a legit, logical question to ask yourself.  Each of us is different.  With me personally, I had insecurity issues with my weight and so I lost it and still working on it.  I had issues with trust from past relationships and God has taught me alot in handling situations when it comes to trust.  I had problems with being selfish and God has opened up my heart to sharing and spending my time building Gods kingdom.  I had problems with finances and using credit cards and God has done an amazing work in my life to show me where my money needs to go too, that He will go beyond what I could dream of to help take care of the debt I put myself in.  Those are just a few things I needed to work on.

So when some of these single friends of mine come up to me panicky or mad or frustrated (all understandable emotions), I simply ask them, "What are you doing to prepare yourself for your future spouse?"  They always look at me with a puzzled look on their face or they hesitate, but alot of times they don't like the question.  Most people walking this earth are selfish people, because we are humans.  Most of us look out for #1 and that's ourselves and we want things NOW and done NOW.  God has graciously showed me that that's just not how God works.  Yes at times He may answer a prayer right away, but during the waiting time, during the process, the molding time, THAT is where you grow, you mature, you grow faith, you grow trust, you grow into who God wants you to be and you learn about yourself and your relationship with the Creator.  THEN, when its time, God will join you and your mate together, but how much more sweeter is that story when the both of you know WHO you are in Christ as a single person, then together you can grow as ONE when your married.

This isn't an overnight fix.  

I remember one night I was laying in my bed praying to God and I thanked Him for this time of singleness.  I got teary eyed when I thought of the day when my life wasn't going to be as calm.  The day when I would have a husband and children running around and then, I'm going to think back of me laying there with nothing going around, no one needing my attention and it would be just me and God and I would want to go back to that moment of singleness for just one second.

I know I will love my life then, but whats wrong with loving our lives now?  We wont get this time back, we wont get back this moment or this time where we can grow and get stuff done before our mate walks in.  I think of how blessed my future husband is going to be, just because God has taken the time to clean out my life and remove people who didn't belong there and remove issues and struggles of mine.  He let me have the time to learn about how to eat right and how to take care of my body and what to eat and what not to eat.  I can take this knowledge and not only share with people around my life now, but my family in the future.

Being single isn't a bad thing.  I understand that there are lonely moments or there are times when you feel your clock is ticking or even just ready to move on to the next chapter, but just remember, God knows EXACTLY where you are and even where your spouse is in their walk.  His ways, His plans, His timing is perfect!  Its always when we allow God to work and when we look back is when we see what He saw all along and THEN we are grateful, but lets me grateful now.  

Sometimes we just have to say, "God, I give this season of my life to you.  You have placed these desires in my heart and in your time they will come true.  Until then Lord, please help mold me into the person you want me to be and mold me into the wife/husband for my future mate.  I pray Lord that you watch over them and help them in their lives and any struggles or issues that they may face.  God please be with me in my times of loneliness and in my times of struggle when I just wish my future spouse was already in my life.  I trust you God that your plans are better than my plans for my life and my life is in your hands.  In this season, please Lord use me to the best way possible to help others and help build your kingdom.  Thank you Lord for this time with just you and me.  In Jesus Name, Amen"

Ive mentioned before that I pray for my future husband everyday.  You betcha I do!!  I have claimed what God has placed in my heart, what He has been preparing me for and its only a matter of when we will join paths.  He is real, he is walking this earth and there is nothing wrong with praying for someone you may or may not of met.  I think that shows trust and faith in God.

So what are you working on if you are single right now to better your life with your future spouse?  Do you have some debts you need to try and pay off?  Do you have a few pounds that you are insecure about?  Do you have any addictions that are weighing you down?  Is there some education you want to get under your belt?  Are their people in your life that are a bad influence or just really don't need to be there?  Do you want to get a better job or higher in your career?  Do you need to clean out your house or get rid of some things?  There honestly is no better time, then now.  How would you feel if your future spouse had this huge baggage that they haven't dealt with and was waiting on you to help them?

Keep working on to be a better you and a better child in Christ each and every day.  Always seek Christ and pray for your future spouse to seek Christ and because both of your eyes are on Christ, He will lead you together.  In my heart, theres really no need to worry and feel like you need to put yourself out there to find someone.  God is the creator of EVERYTHING, He can place 2 people at the right time in His time............just trust Him!!!!!

 

 

A cold

I have a cold.  It came super fast and I didn't even know anything was going around.  One day a girl at work got sick, second day another girl got sick and the third day 2 of us girls got sick.  I thought the other girls were having allergies and I don't suffer that, so I didn't think anything of it. 

I have been on this different eating plan in which I will talk about in a blog soon, but I had to strip a lot of foods out that help the immune system. 

I realized that my immune system was weakened and so I wanted my body to naturally fight this cold without any medicine.  I know there are a lot of people out there that say God made medicine and all that, but I also believe He made our body to naturally strengthen and fight these viruses naturally with natural type foods and ways.  I am not totally anti-medicine.  I believe if every persons situation and the way their body is made, whether they have allergies or asthma or lung issues or whatever, that they may need more attention, but for some of us we don't need to just run to the store and fill our bodies with man made medicine when our bodies can naturally just fight it off. 

In fact I have realized that my colds are half the time and not as bad when I drink plenty of Vitamin C when I'm sick and drink fluids and eat soup and drink
hot tea to break up the congestion.  I remember being more miserable, being drugged up and it prolonged then when I allow my body to fight how its made it too.

I know there are those oils out there too that has helped with sickness for a lot of people.  I also take cough drops to help with the sore throat and my cough.

I just wanted to share this short little blog on what God has laid on my heart.  Every person is different and struggle differently and have different opinions. 

#19 Water jug

I am the worst at getting my water intake daily and at the beginning of the year I got a few of these jugs to take with me to work and around the house so I could finish my water intake without having to think about it too much.  I know that you are really suppose to calculate by your weight, but I knew this would be better than just a bottle or 2 of water a day.  I also had a few packets of Stevia in it for flavor.  I have gotten mine from Walmart for a couple of bucks and even some at Dollar General.  Also what I have realized is that I have saved money because I just use my refrigerator to fill it up with the filter instead of buying all these water bottles all the time.

30 known facts about me

1. John Mayer and Michael Buble music calm me down and bring a smile to my face.
2. Slow dancing in the middle of anywhere is romantic.
3. Watermelon is my favorite food on this planet.
4. I like cheesy romantic.
5. I strive to be the best and I don't think there is anything wrong not settling for less.
6. I enjoy decorating and being creative.
7. I like fluffy things.
8. My favorite color is white.
9. I like to be outdoors and explore.
10. I enjoy bookkeeping and figuring out numbers.
11. My dream vehicle is a Ford Edge.
12. I easily forgive others.
13. Im actually looking forward to my 30's.
14. I love to make memories because life is too short.
15. Spurs is my favorite team, but Im not a big basketball fan.
16. I like to clean and be organized.
17. I believe in "the one".
18. The minions bring a smile to my face.
19. I don't like to eat for the first 2-3 hours of waking up.
20. I like to sleep with a body pillow.
21. Im still a sucker for a stuffed animal.
22. I enjoy working and help providing for my family.
23. I never want to be rich, money wise.
24. I love to help people and give advice and encouragement.
25. I want to move out to the edge of town and build a home.
26. Im very outspoken and I have realized this is how God made me and even though at times it causes problems, most of the time it has helped people get closer to Christ.
27. I have a Sully onesie!
28. I've lost 75 pounds and I have 25 left and I wont stop till I reach it!
29. I like to talk to God while I drive.
30. I don't care what people think of me, only what God thinks of me.

#18 - Stevia

I don't drink anything other than water.  Everything else just seems to be empty calories.  On occasion I might have a tea or maybe some milk, but other than that, its water day in and day out.  That gets boring though right?   Well I have learned that adding some Stevia packets or fluid into your water can change it and make it all better. 

#17 - Hummus and crackers

My snack/meal that I have been munching on lately is hummus and rice crackers.  I also will add celery and carrots to the hummus also to snack on. 

#16 - Ice cream

When I want a small sweet snack, I have found this ice cream that is dairy and soy free!  I love it, it taste good and it takes me about 5 days to eat it, cause I only eat a small pick-me-up at a time.  I know here locally I have found it at our United Supermarket for $5.99 for I think a pint size.

Being the best you can be!

My poor future husband is going to have this pain in the butt, but yet amazing strong woman as his wife.  God has shown me my worth and I love it!  I asked one of my best friends who is a guy the other day if I intimidate men.  I asked him if I'm too strong for a man.  He proceeded to tell me that I am an amazing strong woman and the right guy will appreciate me.

I wondered at times if I should change myself to.......lower myself?  I guess the enemy was in my ear, because my thoughts and yet what came out of my mouth didn't make sense.  God has allowed me in my lifetime to go through alot of trials, in which made me the woman I am today.  I have taken on a lot of responsibilities as a teenager when my mom died with me being the age of 16.  I cant honestly say that I have had this horrible life, but I have defiantly had some low valleys. I have faced losing a parent, the only parent other than my grandfather that I had at a young age.  I have also faced cancer, losing 3 children, and losing my marriage all by the age of 25.  So yes, at the age of 29 and spending time with Jesus this past year, I have found my worth!     

I mow 2  yards, weeded, trim bushes, decorate my home, work full time, have my business on the side, pay bills, hold 2 peoples credit score at a good number, clean house, run errands, volunteer at church, and of course blog and more!!!!  I love my life!! Do I wish I had my own little family at times? Of course!  That's all in Gods timing.  I am seeing God work more and more in my life, preparing me and getting me ready for my future husband.  That man is going to be one blessed man!! This woman right here {thumbs pointing towards her} strives to be a Proverbs 31 woman each and everyday!  I think all the time if God is getting me prepared and I'm loving the process of who I have become, man oh man my husband is going to be a wonderful godly man!  That just brings a smile to my face!  

 

The thing that I realized is that God knew before I was born what kind of life I would have.  He knew how He could use me and He allowed me to face many things at such a young age that has molded me into this person.  A lot of years I didn't face my past hurts and trials and it did damage to a lot of relationships in my life, but that was my fault.  I know the man God has for me will see the strength I have is because of the one who died for me.  I will be weak at times and I will struggle, but I know my husband will be able to help comfort me and pray for me.

 

I have a lot of single friends who are starting or may have been on this journey for awhile and I love to share with them what God has taught me.  I listen and I hear a lot of goals they want to do or they have some issues and struggles they still haven't faced and I understand facing past hurts or insecurities or just a rough childhood is very hard, but its so rewarding.

 

I know with me, I want to be able to give my BEST to my husband and I want us to walk our lives together as strong as we possibly can, especially at the beginning when we start to plan out future together.  Do I have lonely moments or times where I wish I had a mate?  Of course, but one day.....until then I will praise God and be thankful for where I am at in life.  I am very blessed!!!

Waiting....

One thing that I love is when you look back on your life and you see how God made your trials and storms into good.  There have been a few instances in my life lately where I look up at God with a confused look on my face, but then I get this overwhelming, peaceful feeling come over me and God gently says, "Trust me".  I wonder how many times I start to get off course of the straight and narrow and He intervenes and pulls me back on?

If you know me in real life, I'm like "squirrel" in conversations, because I get so distracted by whats around me.  In my heart of hearts, I know God has these amazing specific plans for my life and living in this broken evil world, its hard sometimes to keep your focus on God.  When "squirrel" takes my eyes off of God, He likes to take whatever or whoever it is and remove them from my life so my eyes can stay focused on Him and you know what?  I love it!!!!  In the moment that its taken away, I'm like, "awe man", but then God smiles, hugs me and says, "Wait, for my best!"  What a loving Father!!!  Not only when my eyes start to drift and I start to veer off path, God is such a loving God that He is tender and gently shows me that He has better plans for my life.

 God is working in my life right now in ways that I never even imagined.  I cant wait to blog about it when its all done and just show Gods love and mercy even more than I can right now.  With what He is doing in my life right now is actually carrying over into other parts of my life and He is showing me to not settle with anything.  I think alot of believers forget that God wants to give us His best!  The problem with most of us, is we get impatient and we try to get what we want on our own. I think we strip a lot of blessings away because we don't trust God and have faith in Him. What God is doing in my life, I want to share it to everyone, so hopefully it can touch or influence someone in someway what God does when you wait.  

The key to what I just said, is WHEN ITS DONE!!! I'm still in the process, its still being all worked out and time and weather permits in some of it.  Its not a fast process and I am so excited that I'm actually starting to grow impatient, but I think its because I want to see the outcome.  I'm happy and excited to see the final review, but its all in timing...Gods timing!  

I want to remind you reading this that where you are right now in your life, whether its the best place ever or it couldn't get any worse or possibly life is just taggen along, God has you right here for a reason.  In all times and seasons in our lives we need to give praise to God and thank Him.       

To my single ladies!!!

Ladies, one day theres going to be a man that walks into your life and wants to make it better.  A person who is sent from God and wants to lead you down the straight and narrow path.  Someone who holds your hand to pray with you and a man who wants to make you laugh and protect you all at the same time.  This person will strive to make you happy and you desire the same thing back for them.  Life wont be perfect and hard times will come, but together with Christ as the center you will be able to overcome together as a stronger couple.

God has to get you ready and prepare you to be that wife.  God has to prepare your future husband and get him ready.  We may think we are ready and we might be, but maybe God is still working on him.  God could also be still working in us and wanting us to do His work while we wait.  In the meantime of waiting, when your lonely, when your bored, when you are outside looking at Gods beauty or before you go to bed, say a prayer for your future husband.  Ask God to protect him and to work on him and mold him into the man God wants him to be.  Ladies, our men still needs protection and to be able to overcome temptation.  They need strength and courage to take on whatever God has called them to do, or to even lead us in our future.  Being a godly man and a husband is a huge responsibility and its an honor for them, but we are their help mates and we need to pray for them, even if they arnt in our lives right now.  

How would you feel when God places that man into your life and your future husband tells you that hes been praying for you for a long time?? Take a moment and think about that................I see the smile come across your face.  To know that a husband that we may or may not know right now, was praying for us before God joined us together is a HUGE blessing.  We need to wait on God and pray for our future husband as he is walking with God.    

In the meantime if there is anything you need to work on, now is the time to do it, not when you are trying to start a relationship and have the newness and time consuming effort that comes with it.  If you are wanting to lose some weight, do it!  If you are wanting to get in a woman's group, do it! If you are wanting to start you a business, do it! If you are wanting to travel, do it! If you are wanting to pay off some bills, do it!  Ladies, when God does bring our husbands into our lives, how better of a wife and woman would we be, if we felt confident and sexy, didn't have debt, had some girlfriends for support, had financial stability???  Our men would look at us and respect and honor us that we are a child of Christ and have values and respect for ourselves.  I think men find it attractive when a woman knows who she is and also takes care of her responsibilities.  Also, because we stepped up and worked on bettering ourselves, we make it easier for them and take unnecessary burdens off their shoulders.  

Also I encourage for you to spend this time waiting, with God!!! You will never get this time alone with God again after the man God places in your life and even a family down the road.  Now you have some time to spend one-on-one with God and do His will and volunteer to help others, go to Bible studies, or dance in your room to praise music, and just depend on the Father who loves His princess.  Our  Father who wants to be everything and MORE that we tend to sit here and dream that our husbands will do for us.  God can and will always fulfill us in a way that NO MAN can.  Until us ladies put God first and put our complete trust and faith in Him and be content with that, we will never find it.  We cant find in a another human or an object, what we can find in Christ.  We will get lonely at times and we will crave that companionship, but that's how God made us, but until then, when you feel sad and lonely, just cry on the shoulder of the one who will NEVER leave you.  His big arms are welcome open wide to hug you and comfort you.  

 

 

I want this to be a reminder to all the single ladies who is truly wanting Gods best and who is wanting to wait on God do His work in your lives!  I know I have talked to a lot of single Christian ladies who wonder if there are any good godly men out there and have the same morals and values as we crave and desire, and I'm here to tell you that there are!!  Those desires that is in your heart, exist, because God put them there.  Gods not going to put a desire or a dream in your heart if its not able to be fulfilled.  I would recommend when praying, to ask God to remove any desires that is not from Him and to place the true desires and will He has for your life. 

 

So go ahead girlfriend.... pray for him, write letters to your future husband, work on bettering yourself and thank God for this time alone with just and Him. 

 

You are worth waiting for, don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise!!!

 

 

SELF WORTH OF A WOMAN

SELF WORTH OF A WOMAN
In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question: 'What kind of man are you looking for?' She sat quietly for a ...moment before looking him in the eye & asking, 'Do you really want to know?' Reluctantly, he said, 'Yes. She began to expound, 'As a woman in this day & age, I am in a position to ask a man what can you do for me that I can't do for myself? I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man... or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, 'What can you bring to the table?' The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought & stated, 'I am not referring to money. I need something more. I need a Godly man who is a leader and striving for excellence in every aspect of life. He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, & asked her to explain. She said, 'I need someone who is striving for excellence mentally because I need conversation & mental stimulation. I don't need a simple-minded man. I need someone who is striving for excellence spiritually because I don't need to be unequally yoked...believers mixed with unbelievers is a recipe for disaster. I need a man who is striving for excellence financially because I don't need a financial burden. I need someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but strong enough to keep me grounded. I need someone who has integrity in dealing with relationships. Lies and game-playing are not my idea of a strong man. I need a man who is family-oriented. One who can be the leader, priest and provider to the lives entrusted to him by God. I need someone whom I can respect. In order to be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn't submitting to God or taking care of his business. I have no problem being submissive...he just has to be worthy in Christ. And by the way, I am not looking for him...He will find me. He will recognize himself in me. Hey may not be able to explain the connection, but he will always be drawn to me. God made woman to be a help-mate for man. I can't help a man if he can't help himself. When she finished her spill, she looked at him. He sat there with a puzzled look on his face. He said, 'You are asking a lot. She replied, "I'm worth a lot".

 

Newsboys Concert

Spending time with my gramps on 4-15-15

 Today was such a beautiful day and it was a day that I didn't have a lot to do, so I spent some time outside enjoying the weather and spending time with my grandpa.  He is always at home and dosent get out a lot and my dog needs a friend and she likes to get out too, so we went around town with a bag of bread and fed some birds, ducks, and some gophers.  I love spending time with my grandpa and I wish he could move around better, but hes 85 and I am just thankful and blessed that he is still walking and here with me on this earth!!!

 I love him, he is so darn cute!!! He is the best man that I have ever met and such a godly man.  He still teaches his Sunday school class at his church!

creeeeeeepy pic

 she was the QUEEN OF THE WORLD!!!

................then it was time to go