Therapy

 [I wrote this, but never published it.....like a diary, but felt like sharing at this point in my life.]

I started to go to counseling to face some issues that I have with past trials and situations.  The first time I went to therapy, I had a woman and we didn't click.  I had no emotion talking to her and she gave me no good feed back.  She was late the first time and the next time I was supposed to meet with her, I get a phone call to ask if I could change the time.  I knew then on the phone, I needed to switch people and go with the original guy that was recommended to me in the first place.

I saw him  and within 2 minutes of talking to him, I started to get teary-eyed.  He noticed it and asked me what made my emotions get stirred up.  I honestly didn't understand why I got so emotional.  I thought that I had gotten over the situation with my mother, but I think its something that I will always carry, because each and every new chapter of my life, I wish she was here to help me and give me advice and just smile at me and tell me shes proud of me. 

We talked about alot of my life's ups and downs, to my mother and then to my most recent with Brian.  Of course the first session, was just a brief of what hes getting himself into.  He told me that usually he allows 4 sessions before getting into the deep stuff, but then said, "I don't think its going to be that many."  I told him I had issues and he said, we all do, we just need to work on coping with them.  He gave me this amazing homework assignment that's going to take me months or years to do, but its for me and in turn will benefit me and my book.  He also told me some awesome advice that I will carry with me.  He told me a story and I just smiled, because its exactly what I was going to do with Brian, if we get another second chance of what some lady did to her husband.

I had a connection with this man.  He calls people out, he tells you things to do to better yourself and I felt really comfortable talking to him.  I think because I talk to so many women, we all have the same mentality for the most part, but I respect a mans opinion and I think its because they think different than we do.

All growing up, I have worked with women, had a mother, and of course have my girl friends.  We all think men are weird and complicated and I know that men think the same about us.  So when I can get into a conversation with a man, I feel as if my mind and thinking is opened up to a broader perspective.

I think this is exactly what I need and I feel as if God stirred me into this direction and have opened up doors that I never thought of.  He is also a Christian and believes in God and gave me Godly advice.  I'm working on a brand new me, so everybody watch out!!!!!  I might just touch your life in some way with my story!!! :)



April 10, 2014


I went to therapy again today and my therapist read out of the Bible.  You cant get a better therapist than that!!!  I'm reading a book called "Becoming the woman God wants me to be" and its a 90 day guide to living the Proverbs 31 life.  He wanted to break it down with each verse (21 of them) to determine what kind of woman I really need to be.  After we went through each and every verse, breaking it down, looking up meanings he said, "Wow, your going to be a remarkable woman when you reach it".  I told him that it was do-able with Gods help and he agreed.

When I prayed the prayer for God to mold me into the woman he wants me to be, God has been amazing at helping me achieve that goal. God has been opening up doors for me and guiding me through this life and I am honestly thankful for this time.