Weightloss

I was looking at my blog that I made last year when I set my goal to lose weight.  I did lose 20 pounds the first month and I lost a total of 8 inches from working out and eating better. 

My weightloss blog

I was looking at some of the blogs and realized what I thought was eating healthy, wasn't at all.  It wasn't the worst foods, but it wasn't what I can eat now.  Currently I have lost a total of 33 pounds by just changing my foods.  I am now in the process of needing to work out as my body
is starting to get flabby.  I remember losing weight last year, I went head first in with going to the gym 6 days a week and eating better that I know I burned myself out. I knew in order for me to be successful, I needed to just take one thing at a time.  I needed to learn what to eat, when to eat and how much to eat and I feel as if I have that down.  I do treat myself a cheat day, which is what everyone needs, because it keeps you sane and it makes your cravings go away.  I do have 44 more pounds to go and before it seemed like this impossible goal, but I have to remember that my highest weight at one point was 286 and I'm now 224.  I'm half where I used to be and half towards my goal.

Losing weight has changed my whole mental aspect on life.  I feel good in my skin, I feel like I have a goal and I'm thriving to reach it.  Even before looking at other girls, I was so insecure that I would pretty much put them down because of jealousy.  I now look at girls as beautiful, for who they are. 

I do appreciate this time in my life that God has given me.  I feel as if He has done this total makeover, transformation in my life.  I know it was His help that has pushed me and motivated me to become who I am, internal and external.  I can see looking back how I couldn't make any man happy being with me.  I was so unhappy with my inner and outer self that there was no way, no man could measure up, because it was my demons that I had to deal with.  My God is a gracious and loving God for letting me get a handle on my life and to have this time to face them head on.  I know it was because God showed me something valuable, something that I asked for and he handed it to me and yet he showed me what I could have, but because I wasn't ready, I lost it.  I don't think I could of been as successful if I never met Brian.  I don't feel as if I would of noticed my faults and felt them as much as I had, if I never felt what I did.

Its okay though, because I love who I am and I don't know what the future holds.  I do take each day one at a time, to better myself and to motivate and help others.  During this time of my life, Ive noticed how rewarding it is to be there for people.  Everyone always seemed to be there for me and I remember thinking I never gave it back.  I love knowing that I have true friends who stick by my side and me by their side. 

I know I'm right where I need to be in life, because God has me here.  I know anything extra down the road is going to be added bonuses!