I loved this video. I love the illustration that it gave. I know I'm in a battle right now and its a constant pull and tug. I have been doing everything that I know to keep my eyes on the Lord, but the enemy attacks my mind, my thoughts, my heart and my faith and also the people around me. I have had thoughts of suicide lately, even though I know they arnt my thoughts. I read the Bible daily, constantly learning. I know its why I'm a target.
One thing I know about me is that I'm very driven. I am determined to fight for relationships, I'm determined to reach the goal that I set for myself, I'm determined to try my hardest and walk with God as close as possible. It can get very difficult when you wake up in fear, when driving down the road you cry out of sadness or you get angry for no reason. These wave of emotions are Satan's way of trying to tear me down. He fills my mind with doubts and tells me nothing good will ever come out of my life. My faith is starting to weaken, but the most important thing of this, is I know that he is attacking me. It can be so hard, but I refuse to let him defeat me, for my Savior already won the battle. I have to keep fighting. I have to keep reading God's word, staying strong, not stray from my Heavenly Father, keep pushing through this battle that is going on with my life right now. I know once I get through this battle, I will see the light, I will have peace and rest, but I know its going to be hard before the calm. I have had 6 months of tools that God has prepared for me, I have to put the armor on and cling to the promise God has told me. When its all said and done, Ill be that much stronger and that much more of a witness to others, which is something I pray for.
Please pray for me.....
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