I
would like to consider myself a hopeless romantic. I love all the
gushy love sap movies and dream of it all happening to me. I know, just
as well as you do, most of the time it doesn't happen that way. Ive
seen couples who you know are in love and it shows. I can admit that in
my past, Ive wanted things to be "perfect" that I would give him some
sort of list or ways to do things so it could be "perfect". I find
nothing more romantic now is when I see a guy give his all the way he
wants too. I hate that I feel as if I stripped alot away from true romance
in my life for me trying to control situations.
I
love LOVE! Its a gift from God and God does care about our love life.
Its hard sometimes to walk around in love with someone whom you cant be
with. I pray daily for God to write my love story. I know God has put
this desire in my heart.
I
was sharing with my grandpa the other day that the desire that burns within my
heart is to have a home where people can come over and have Bible
studies and where the women meet in the kitchen and the men are grilling on the deck and where the kids run around in the
backyard. I would love to be married to a very godly man who wants to
serve and please the Lord with everything he has. I want to have a
family where we raise the kids to glorify God and teach them the ways of
living a Christian life with morals and values. I want the cheesy,
riding in an SUV with Christian music playing and my babies singing to
God. I want to be a part of a church family where my husband and I can
be an example and encourage and help kids, teens and young adults. I want my husband to hold my hand and we pray together and our family pray together.
I
know life isn't that picture perfect, but I know I didn't stick this
desire in my heart. Its there, swarming around and I know that God is
lining everything up. I let God know that Im here, I'm here to be used
and I'm thankful for the desires that God has placed on my heart. I'm also
very thankful and extremely blessed the past 5 to 6 months and how God
has molded me. I'm not near perfect, but right now I'm still learning
Gods word, getting healthier and helping others and I'm waiting on God to
show me what to do next. This life is a journey and its a big lesson.
We can either take the hard times and grow and draw near to God, or we
can take them ourselves and learn the hard way or delay the process in
which God has for us. I have had many lessons and this time, I didn't
want to delay the process or learn the hard way. I didn't want myself to
be in long suffering as from before.
God
has been amazing to me and has opened my eyes up in a very loving and
patiently manner. I still have my moments of impatience just like
every human walking this earth battles, but at the end of the day, I
know God has me here for a reason and while I wait on the next best
thing from God, I will praise Him! :)
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